1)Set up a list of desires/expectations for the divorce in terms of child custody, finances,possessions, etc
2)Meet with the lawyer this afternoon to see which things on the list are/aren't reasonable/legal/acceptable.
3)Share this list and the input I receive from the lawyer with Dan.
4)Prepare in every way for the divorce except the actual filing. He will need to do that himself since it is what he wants.
5)Continue to make plans for myself and the kids in a future where I am not married to Dan. Be polite to Dan, but do not act toward him as a wife anymore. I read about those who want to be their spouse's best friend and it ultimately saved their marriage....I feel like I have been trying that and it has brought me to this point.
This is not an attempt to get his attention. I need to accept that if H does not want me in his life, any attempt on my part to bait him, manipulate him, pressure him to stay, etc will just make it worse and make him run away even faster.
I think it is time I just open up the gate and let him run free. What he does after that is up to him. He will most likely find the gate locked behind him...
