Hey ladies... my wonderful friends... uggghhh.. Things aren't so great here... but I've been hestitant to post because its just the same old stuff..
Friday night we ended up going to this outside bar with his old classmates (it was only 30 degrees out) not too smart if you ask me.. but I went. We dropped the kids off at my mother's house. I didn't want to stay late because i wasn't feeling that great.. when it came time to leave he didn't want to and actually got mad at me. He had too many drinks. I didn't want to get to my mom's too late (it was about 11pm) as she wanted to go to bed too. He started this big fight with me and i just didn't even want to talk to him. He wouldn't stop though, it made it worse that he had been drinking, and he doesn't drink. anyways, I let most of what he said go, but of course it doesn't make our relationship stronger in my eyes, just another jab in my heart.
Sat. was my nieces party, her 1st bday. it was ok. i was really not feeling well, but I know i wouldn't hear the end of it. I made little tags with her name on them and her birthdate and attached them to these flower candy lollypops i made. i made 36 of them. Then h was actually nice in the morning and made the spinach dip for me. It was an ok day, just long and i felt like poo poo.
sunday i woke up really hurting. S5 is sick too, I did end up doing laundry all day, but nothing major.
I kept S5 home today, he was still coughing.
Work has been so bad, friday I was at the computer for 10 hours, the house was a disaster and nothing got done. Today was more of the same.
I told H that Im not going to continue to live like this much longer. I get nothing done but work. Everything else just falls apart. i have too much to do. so he told me to hire someone. im going to try and find a temporary cleaning/maid person/helper. just to help me catch up. I had to fa 50 people on friday, so this is what I mean... its crazy.. i feel like im going crazy.
That's mostly why I feel run down all the time.
Things are weird between us right now. He really ticked me off friday, but I just don't have the strength right now to care.
sorry for the long vent..:)
Yup 20 kids.. it really wasn't that bad, i was exhausted after, but S5 had such a great day.. he says "mommy, it was such a great day today" and that's all i needed to hear
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
Sorry your H is being JACM (Just-Another-Clueless-Male). I'm afraid we all go through this at one time or another -- it tends to come with the territory. And it seems to have a recurring counterpart in women too unfortunately. The male variety just seems to be so gosh-darn... pathetic.
Hooray for being the major event organizer and party mama for your S. Well done.
But I freely admit that I have been utterly clueless in my M (especially in the latter stages) like soooo many husbands I see today-- or else I wouldn't be here at all.
It's a fault I hope to keep in check for the rest of my life (which means I now have something that will keep me busy all my waking hours. ) It's a full-time job just to remain conscious of it.
Thats Just it NoCode at least you know and you are working on it.
H's are not the only clueless ones in many cases. We all have a tendency to fall by the way side because of the lack of communication, and that takes Two
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) It's a full-time job just to remain conscious of it.[quote]
You have that right.
MY H has always been the type that did whatever and put me at the end of the list for the most part. He didn't totally ignore me but i came after what he wanted to do. I adjusted and did things on my own and with my children.
Now the kids are gone and he is older I think he felt the distance and decided it was my fault. (that we had nothing in common) Now I am working on what I want for me and what I want in my M he just needs to decide to join me or not.
Sorry for the hijack Tal
JAK
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
H is leaving for Ohio this afternoon. Has a problem with one of the jobs that they did. He will be back Friday morning.
S5 has been sick since Saturday. Took him to the dr.'s yesterday. His lungs were inflamed, so they put him on a different asthma medication. It's been a long wk and its not even over.
Saturday Im supposed to go to a baby shower, which I dont feel like going to but its my friends niece and she really wants me there. I didn't want to bring the kids (this is the friend that has her son that is violent). But I have knowhere to take them. But I think if S5 isn't 100% better, Im going to just tell her I can't make it. We need a quiet wkend. The last 3 wkends we have been on the go, and its all catching up with all of us. I still can't shake my cold.
So I would like to have a quiet wkend for a change. next wkend is halloween and I don't want the kids to miss out on it.
Sorry for the babble.. .just felt like babbling
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
He left yesterday afternoon... Took the kids to target and walked the mall because I had to get away from my work. I haven't just walked aimlessly around not thinking about anything in a long time, I needed it.
Spent money I shouldn't have but mostly on them. Went to eat in food court then home S2 fell asleep on the way home!! S5 stayed up and watched Alvin and the chipmunks movie.. it was cute.
me: 37 H: 44 Married for 18 years this june S7 S3 porn issues, and much more... since 7/06
Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
) It's a full-time job just to remain conscious of it.