Got home from work today and H was here combining at the other place. I of course wanted to call him, or rush over there and see if he needed anything. I didn't. I cleaned house instead. Made an apple cake. And started supper. I was home alone as the girls were at VB.
A little before 6 H came. He came in the house. It's so hard for me to be pleasant and I probably give him the impression that I am not too happy to see him. Of course I am but the mess wins over. Anyway, he asked me to take him back to get the truck. We did. He came in for a bit. Then asked if it was okay for him to crash on MY couch and go to work from here. I didn't say anything. He said "or no". I said, "no". He started to put his jacket back on. I laughed and said of course you can. I told him I was making myself a burger and salad and asked if he wanted some to. He said he didn't care. We ate and watched TV.
After awhile H turned my way and said "how about some dessert?". I said "I have apple cake" (I knew what he meant) he said "not the kind of dessert I was thinking". I didn't answer. Finally he said, is that a no? I said " I didn't say anything, I guess it has been so long, I am kind of stunned. I went to the BR he followed. It was okay, more intimate than has been, but I so miss the passion. The best part was spooning with him and laying wrapped in his arms. I didn't stay too long though because I didn't want to keep him awake.
When he left for work, he said he might be back in the AM. WTH?? But I'm not banking on it, nor does it matter. This time TOH is not getting dragged in or down. I HOPE!!! It's still Whatever! H. It's still NC for me. It's time for TOH to move forward. If he decides to come along, that's wonderful. If not, his stupidity.
M41 H42 D17 Adopted N14 M22 T24 "Bomb" 4/07 Sep 8/07 Admitted OW 11/07(only to me) OW back 12/4/07 PA on off thru 7/08 says done w/OW but not coming home 8/08 D final 7/09 Moving on and up!!
