One thing I hadn't thought about last night is that one of my women friends from the DB board had sent me a birthday card and some presents and I had left them on the table where we leave mail for each of us. It was clearly visible and was signed 'Love, xyz'.
Since she was there before I had gotten there last night, she probably saw it. Maybe that's why she felt uncomfortable.
Today around 4 pm she came and knocked on the door. I went to the door and she asked me if she could come in to get a coupon that was on the mail pile. I said pleasantly 'sure, go ahead'. I asked how her knee was doing and she said it was getting better.
Then she asked me if the girls were home and I said they were in their rooms. So she says 'Is it ok if I go say hi to them, since I'm already here?'
Again I said pleasantly "sure, that would be nice". So she goes upstairs. Weird. It's not like I was hovering around her watching her.
When she came back down to leave, I asked her if she was going to pay me this weeks $60 next week since she was having cash flow problems.
She got defensive, said she got money today and would transfer it tomorrow when she's here in the morning and can use her computer. She complains she doesn't have enough time to do that so sometimes it takes her till later in the week.
Now, she's here every morning to be with the kids and take them to school. I have never told her not to come over, and she has at least 20 minutes of free time between dropping off D17 and D13.
I stop her and say "Hey, I wasn't asking you for the money, I'm saying that I don't need it right now and if it's better to wait a week that's ok with me"
Then she goes on saying that "Well I can't pay $120 in a week, $60 is about what I make in tips each week so that way I can keep up".
Anyway, she calmed down and promised to pay me tomorrow.
I also found out that they are having a halloween party at the dysfunctional house. I think she invited D13 and D17 because D13 told me she wasn't going because she was going out with her friends. Don't know what D17 plans to do.
Finally, was talking to a db friend who said this: What if she went away to this place last week, after hearing you tell her what a financial mistake it was right before she left, and that's all she thought about. Remember that she sees me as the 'leader', even now.
What if she missed you and the girls and didn't miss OM? That would piss her off. Add that to he probably thinking that 'Frank doesn't want me' and that she has gone past the point of no return, she might be thinking she made a mistake.
Well, and pigs might fly too! Anyway it's puzzling why she came back so unhappy instead of in a good space like she usually does. You do have to be sure that she was thinking about the last time she went there and how I encouraged her to go.
