[To my mind, the divorce busting strategy, principly, is a strategy aimed at maturing the abandoned spouse, a stategy for emotional growth to help the abandoned spouse fully appreciate love and companionship. Sometimes the wayward spouse notices the change and opts to stay, but I honeslty think that's only a side note to what is really going on.]

This is a very good observation for someone who has only been here a short time (judging by your membership date) or have you been here longer then I think?

It takes time to recognize that you aren't here to just save your marriage, but that you are here to save yourself! If the marriage is saved in that process then that's a plus. Heck there are people who have been here for years who still don't get it! Trust me, I know some of them!

I believe that that period of time when you still think divorcebusting is all about the marriage, you know the marriage is over but you think you did absolutely nothing wrong, that's when it's way to soon to be looking at relationships. Imagine two DBers both in that stage "hooking up". OUCH!

Just go back to the newbie stuff and read some of it. Wow it brings back memories of how tough it really is. How hurt and low we all were, how fall we have all come. Imagine being in that stage and trying to date! No way...

Gigi

Last edited by mastateflower; 10/21/08 08:03 PM.
"It's not what happens to you, it's what you make of it." Zig Ziglar