I think I may belong here.

[1hope]

No connection, sex was nice but it was just sex and even though he is a man that bothers him.

WHY do they always say that? And the "even thought he is a man" What does that mean? That women never have sex just to "have sex."

He is angry with himself.

Oh yes he is. And that's a good thing. Probably one of the most honest feelings that he has. I love the thought of you as the OW. Go for it K. We all need a good 'rogering" now and then!

Last one was along the lines of trying to be friend and good father, but I feel like I'm doing something wrong.

Well yeah, stepping outside your M is wrong. Doing wrong will not make you feel good, for long.

I would love to tell him what is wrong. I would love to tell him that he just needs to undo RCI. I would love to tell him that he has turned me into OW. I would love to tell him I love you and it's ok. But I KNOW I can't tell him any of that. So I just haven't replied anymore. If I dared to tell him MLC, he would just think I was crazy. If I dared to tell him you have shut off your heart, he would get mad. I just don't know what to do.

you're doing it. Don't do anything. Just breathe and enjoy your day. You can always tell God that you love your H. You can count all of your blessings. You can write down all of the things you would like to say to your H., and send it to us. Like you just did.

Only God can heal him. On His schedule.

I should be grateful for the small things like he is talking to me.

Yes, baby steps

I should be grateful because he is looking for the connection with me and feels badly because it isn't there

This could be guilt too. At least he misses the connection, which is a good first step.

I guess I should be grateful that he is trying to be my friend.

That's a good first step. Keep being his friend, the other things will come slowly.

Lord, I pray that you will send your healing and comfort to my husband and help him through this very rough time he is going through. Thank you for all of your blessings.

K, I'll pray with you, for all of us! I saw this one elsewhere on the boad and I love it:

Heavenly Father, please give me comfort and strengthen me during these trying times. Let me feel your presence and know that you are there to guide me. Give me the patience to wait while you bring things to fruition in Your own time. Remind me that this is the time to work on the things in me that need change, in order to prepare me for the reformed husband that you will present to me.

I know that the challenges in my life are brought as tests of true faith and so I welcome the opportunity to reaffirm my faith in You. Watch over my husband and be the small voice in his ear that will lead him back to You. I rebuke the demons that are attacking this marriage that you crated as an outward sign as your perfect love. I ask this in your son Jeasus' name.