I survived last evening. Never heard from H at all. Woke up at some point close to midnight and he was in bed with me. Woke up again at 2 and he was getting out of bed to go down and watch tv.The wine and hot tub before bed usually make me sleep like a baby. I also had a quiet little feeling sorry for myself cry that helped too.
This morning I did not jump right out of bed, in fact, when I got my coffee I brought it back to bed with me to relax for an extra few minutes.
When H finally got up he was whining because I had not woken him up. I was out of the shower at that point and drying my hair. He waid, well aren't you going to help with my lunch today? I just looked at him and said, "you want me to help you with your lunch?... I didn't think you were going to work today, you were out so late last night." You know, it's just common courtsey, I had no idea where you were or what was happening. A call wold have been good. He said if I call you bitch at me. I said yes, I used to, I don't any more.
He looked terrible. His eyes were swolen and bloodshot, and I would imagine he probably has a nasty headache. He said yes, I am going to work. I just went about getting myself ready.
A little later I asked him if he could quickly put another hole in a belt that I was wanting to wear... needed another inch in from the last notch He said he would do it if I would help him make his lunch. I smiled and said sure.
I packed a nice lunch for him and he fixed my belt. He told me that one of his brothers had called him about a position that was going to be opening in his company, and h talked a bit about that. It would be a good job, but would require some travel, which he hates. I said it sounds like a good opportunity and I asked if he would be layed off during the winter. He said no. Hmmm. Guess he now has something else on his mind.
As he was going out the door he said will you be home tonight? I said, H I come home every night. He said, well do you want to have the steaks for dinner (that he took out of the freezer on Saturday and we had planned to have last night?) I said, "if they're still good."
This is all so hard to understand. My H used to notice every little thing about me. He would always, always give me some sort of a comment about what I was wearing, or my hair, before I went out the door each morning. Not only does he not do that any more, I don't think he even sees me most of the time!
It truly is a fog.
Last edited by 1hope; 10/21/0801:38 PM.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
He said he would do it if I would help him make his lunch. I smiled and said sure.