This is the worst conversation that we have ever had, by far. He kept saying that I just needed to accept this. The only things that could have at all been construed as hopeful were when he said that I should look to transfer to the US as if we had any hope of things working it could only be there, but in his mind still there was really no hope. I see this mainly as him trying to get me away from him.
I said so much that I shouldn't have. I told him how vindictive he was acting, and how he didn't care about anyone but himself. I cried for about an hour, and I woke up crying again this morning. I don't understand how someone can be so cruel and cold. Whether he believes he loves me now or not, he says he thinks I am wonderful. I told him that he treated me worse than an enemy. He really does.
In terms of living apart, still not sure. Now he doesn't even want the trial living sitch, well at least last night he didn't. Tomorrow I will probably stay with a friend. I did tell him that this was very unfair on me as all of the finances are in my name and he said he'd be wiling to sign some sort of contract about the debt or whatever. This just made me mad.
Honestly though I am in a country that I don't want to be in trying to hang on to a marriage with someone who doesn't want to be with me, and paying for a house where he doesn't want to live with me til June. I am having a really hard time coping. Then the holidays are coming up too.
I am not sure whether this could blow over in a day or two. He said it's how he's been feeling for the last month. I am still crying this morning. He's in bed, and I feel sick to my stomach. I told him I wanted a day's break from talking about it though.
ITH
Me:34 H:36 M:5 years T: 8 years Bomb: 07/17/08 I want to be separated for 6 months--I don't know what I want the outcome to be S 07/28/08-11/08/08 Living together ~7 months D Possibly busted?!?!!!
