Piecing - Post Traumatic Stress?

[saffie]

I think you are right when you say that the one that wants the R the least has the most power. That's exactly it.

When my H told me about his A and my world fell in, he had what felt to me like all the power in the R. Up until then I thought we were a team....but then he had the power to rip apart our world and destroy it all. I made huge changes, ( that did need making anyway), and actually my H did make changes too......but many on here have S's that don't seem to change all that much. Even though my H did make changes, I realised once we hit the safe, non crisis zone, that I felt a lot of hurt at what my H had been able to do, and that caused me to get resentful. I did nearly walk at that point.

Gradually things improved. I would be lying if I said that I never think that perhaps it would have been better to split, but I do KNOW deep inside that would have been wrong. I love my H very much....and he has shown time and time again that he wants to be with me. Sometimes...just sometimes though, some resentment will surface in me for what he did....and that's when I have to put my DB face on and just act as if until the feeling goes away again.

I don't think the M will ever be in a situation where I feel I am not having to work at it. That's one thing that I have learnt - my M got into trouble because we didn't work at it enough. If something is worth having it is worth fighting for and looking after.