Read DR. Read the archives. Read other people sitches. I too am sorry you are here. I have found some very good friends though who make me laugh and cry and they listen to me do both as well.
I feel most for your children. You need to be strong for them. You also need to be strong for yourself. I would really consider checking out rejoiceministiries.com. I know you said you aren't religious but you may be surprised. We all get tested in different ways to try to bring us back. I consider myself more spiritual than religious if that helps. I just believe there has to be something greater out there. I've seen too many things to believe otherwise.
Good luck and try to keep a PMA. It gets easier as time goes by. You can only control yourself, so you can't worry about what she is doing.
If you focus on the past, you ruin the future. You can only live for today.
