Sex is a three letter word (I refer to it as "huh?") that exists in the same realm as Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy. It is a delusion while married since it doesn't really exist. It was also created so that it would be easier for priests to remain celibate. We're all one in the same... except we believe they don't have it (since sex doesn't exist).
Sex only applies to the gender of a baby and various stages of aging. Although a popular misconception is that one must HAVE sex to beget a child, one must simply be of two opposite sexes to have that bear fruit.
Kissing, flipping the bird at inopportune times and playing with firetrucks are what really cause pregnancy in females (along with the occsaional transgender individual). The "G" spot is nonexistent. Think of the word 'sigh'. Do you hear a G? No. Any letter you cannot hear continues the conspiracy of sex (for pleasure, frustration, etc) being real.
Of course personal.. errrmmm.. pleasure does exist. That is why the internet was created to allow others to be personal on an individual basis titillating only their mind and other responsive areas. These feelings can be recreated by gender.. women on a shopping spree, men with the remote during an exciting football game. However since most people want to improve their typing skills, internet interactions tend to be favored.
To debunk the theory that the male plug is made for the female socket, let me say "Whoa! Never heard such hootenanny in my life." The male appendage when.. motivated.. is the perfect cleaning accessory. It's very handy for hanging small washcloths (oops, forgot about the frail male ego).. hand towels (little ones), neckties and the occasional thong. A man's erection is a misnomer since it is parallel to the ground, creating a cute pup tent when clothed. I prefer the term 'levitation'.
A woman's innards continue to be mysterious, except when it comes to birthing babies (another popular myth. Babies come from duffle bags made of breathable fabric. When the mother howls at the perfect pitch of a zipper unzipping, the baby is lifted from the bag, rolled in gook and handed to the doctor with a tip expected. Actually, elevators would never exist if it weren't for a woman's vagigi. The rhythmic gripping was the inspiration for people size containers sliding up and down a cable smoothly. On a side note, 'muzak' was created for elevators to jam any sexual thoughts potentially awakened while in the conveyance. The sex in the elevator fantasy only occurs in non muzak elevators.
It is with great sorrow that I educate you on the realities of life but hope that true knowledge will ease any imaginary desires you think you feel.
*hugs*
(... now those are a completely different subject!)
