I still believe in miracles

[istherehope]

Hi JCJ,

Thanks :). I feel like I am walking through a minefield, sidestepping potential R conversations at every moment. ANYTHING that has to do with the house can turn into one of these and already something came up about our boiler.

Now H is out jogging and I am listening to music. As soon as he gets back I am going to leave early to meet my friend. OK trying to keep the PMA...It's just hard knowing that the R is on trial. So the R is on trial, but it can't be what it should be because he is keeping me at arms' length, very difficult...

I have been pushing the envelope a little bit with physical affection today. There was the kiss when he was in bed, then just before I actually left, I went back in and kissed him all over his face, and joked around about how cuddly he was. When I got back, I did this little half-hug thing. As usual, he resisted. I think if we can get past that physical barrier, things will improve.

My goal=him agreeing for me to stay in the house longer. This is my main goal, and I am trying to achieve this through making myself as indispensable to the house as possible...So, off to do the dishes!

ITH