I noticed you said you 'ended up calling W' and having a nice lengthy chat... in terms of DBing, I'd say that was probably a no-no... especially if she has asked for space. If she initiates any convo's/phone calls, all well and good.
I dont know what you're finances are like (mine are abysmal) but I paid for 3 sessesions with a DB coach and it was very helpful and instructional in how to handle the ex... in my case, it came just at a point where I wasnt sure what was going on.. unfortunately I then found out he was seeing someone, so. I dont know.. in your case, she has an OM, but you are M with a son, so there are more reasons to want to try again..not that she has wanted to so far.
I think you said the OM lives in your village!?? Do you know much about him? (theres that other DB stuff, know what they are offering your WAS that you arent)... but dont know how you would apply that to you.
I agree with the others that you need to try and be more together, even if you are faking it till you make it. My DB coach advised me not to answer the phone straight away and then be out of puff and say, hey I just got in... like, pretend!? She said the last thing you want to present is a picture of a devastated human being, the WAS cant stand it, they cant stand the guilt and shame, dont appear needy, weepy or in any way like they ruined your life.. its not attractive.
Well, thats all the Db advice I have, for whats its worth!
Ali xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
