Trying2Live-New Post #2

[TxMomw/2girls]

Ladies.... heavy stuff and I'm crying JGrind for you and your kids...

T2L - please send what you pray over your H .. they could use it as I'm quite sure that I'm the only one praying for him right now.

Marisol - damn right I'd be right in the sack with my H if he wanted it...if I could let my mind be free of OW for the moment... I know it would set me back about a week or two emotionally but how I crave and want my H so bad... I had a dream last night - the first one where we were kissing and it was so real and so great... when I woke up I realized only person laying next to me was my D3 .... hang in there .... you know what you can handle ... it is interesting that our H want to be faithful to the OW now...

Hope - you did so AWESOME>.. great "as if" and detatching... so proud of you.. the more we practice this the better and easy it becomes for us... I think for any of us if our H come back we need to remember to keep things a little mysterious anyhow - to keep them on their toes...

T2L - you are doing great... I thought of sending a flirty text yesterday but I felt he'd see through it and to soon... good way to work it and act as if it came from another friend...

TwinHOpe - updates please.... how are you doing...

My thread got locked so I started a new one... "txmom - I'm still hopeful - #2 post" you can read some there or on the newcomers thread...

Ok updates on me... After my ordeal with my H not answering or calling me back after a 911 text and two calls and I laid into him pretty good - backsliding - I had made arrangements for others to watch my girls while out of town on business.. I woke up and decided that he needed to be there for the girls and I need to encourage him vs. me continuing to tell him he isn't "good enough" and "screwed up" again... my H will sit and self pitty with negative words over me being calm, nice ... I decided to send him an email with some request and appologize for my lashing out on the phone.. Here is his response"

First off I am very sorry for yesterday and instead of making excuses I will let you know that my phone will be on ring all the time from this day forward so there will be no more missed calls. You know I do care about the girls in everything they do or that happens to them. They are my first priority and will always be my first priority for ever. I will commit to calling D3 and D5months every morning and every night before they go to bed because believe it or not I miss them dearly, there is not a day that goes by that I am not thinking of them. I know that these are just words but I will prove to you and the girls that there Daddy can be counted and is there for them by my actions moving forward. It will take time to make up for the mistakes I have made but they deserve the best Dad that I can be. I will meet you in the middle on everything no questions asked. Thank you for everything you do and I really mean it.


This is more than I've gotten in long time... we had a good visit when I got home last night and I text him told him thanks and he said it was the best day and half he had had in long time...

He will be here Saturday thru Sunday morning to watch the girls and I had mentioned going to the state fair for our D3 and he said he would go... we'll see -

read my new post if you can b/c I do still struggle with being to nice and the fact the my H is a little co-dependant and still staying with OW and not getting his own furnished apt - which found but hasn't signed.

But as one of my freinds mentioned we are the only ones capable and sane to fight for our family during this crisis .. for me to recognize that due to his lack of judgment earlier in the week when my D was choking it must have made him think and feel so for this week he is out of the fog a bit... but I'm still not going to expect anything or that he'll even go to the fair on Saturday so I'm not let down...

As DR says ( I just finished it) right down and note the small signs and positive steps we see and hold on to that and not the negative... I know with my H if I keep bringing up and critizing the negative things and what he isn't doing .. it won't make him do it... all this DR and DB stuff is right on just feels unnatural at times when we are hurting..

Recognize some results any small sign as a good one...

hang in there....