Thank you so so much. Amazing the support and love I feel from people I have never met, yet people that are so close to my heart.
It feels really good to be home with the girls tonight. I thought I would want all this time alone today. Nope. Wanted the babies with me. We went to the mall for dinner and shopping. Arrived needing winter clothes for D6, and left with 2 outfits for their Build A Bears. Oops. But it was really fun. Just what the doctor ordered.
I am a bit shredded as reality is sinking in slowly. H didn't come by tonight per my request.
This just hurts. Raw pain. I have had to honestly remember to breathe today. I find myself taking very shallow breaths, and not sitting still enough. But time will heal all of us. I am focusing on not waking up tomorrow with a heavy heart, but to wake up and face the day, knowing the pain will come and go, but also knowing it will be ok.
I will not see him again until Saturday. My friend (who will be D'ed in 3 weeks) is taking me out tomorrow night and we will leave before H comes to see the girls.
As usual you handle yourself with such grace, strength, courage, serenity. You are so inspiring!!! Glad you are doing what you need to do for you. I always find being with the kids so comforting too, and glad you have them. That's great that you have a friend who is going through it too and is supportive like that. ((((((LWB)))))))
I'm sorry you had to go through today. But you did it with grace and dignity. And now you are on the other side of the tunnel. You will more than survive. You will thrive, and you will take care of your girls too.
I am so sorry that I wasn't there to add to the encouraging and loving words leading up to today, but I hope you have been given a kind of mirror, here, to see the wonderful woman and mother you are, to have inspired so many of us.
My date was back in June, and honestly, I don't remember too much of it, now. Its not a focus for me...know that the pain that you are feeling will not be forever. I myself found that so hard to believe until one day, I just stopped and noticed, hey, its not as bad...
Your girls will be your lifesavers, and you will be theirs. With this other part behind you, you can focus on them, then enjoy some occasional babysitting to get things done and have some time for yourself.
It feels really good to be home with the girls tonight. I thought I would want all this time alone today. Nope. Wanted the babies with me.
Went through the same, exact feelings this afternoon. When I arrived at my parents' house to get the boys, all I could do was love and embrace them. Seeing and feeling the joy on their faces is the best kind of medicine.
Our children give us such strength, don't they?
Take care of yourself, precious lady. We all love you.
(((((((lwb)))))))
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
I'm glad you have a friend to take you out tonight. I know my friends (and this BB) have been a lifeline for me. I dont think I could have moved on and GAL without them and all of you.
Not that it is final, I hope you can move on from the limbo ride. It is going to take time to re-adjust your image of yourself...you are no longer a wife but a divorcee. And you know what, that is ok. As I was talking to my friends last night they kept telling me stories of their friends or family members who moved on from a divorce into a much better R. That they all survived and came out of the battle in a much better position. There were stories of WAS who left for the AP as well, and things did not turn out well for them. I hold onto those stories. It gives me strength to know that I did all I could and will get the loving relationship I want one day. It also gives me hope that one day STBXH will be accountable for his actions. Even if he never is, right now feeling like he will be helps me to move on.
You handled your D graciously and wonderfully. You are my hero and I hope I can be as strong as you when my day comes. (((HUGS)))
Broken Hearted ------------------ Me - 36 H - 37 S - 8 Married - 1992 ILYNILWY - August 2007 Moved Out - March 2008 OW Revieled - May 28, 2008 Filed for D - July 2, 2008
How are you today? Sounds like you had a nice night with your girls.
The night with your friend sounds fun. Maybe it's time to get your groove on and do a little "window shopping", I know you are not ready for a new "purchase". Have fun and enjoy yourself. Try not to think about the past when you are out,think about your wonderful new future!
Hugs, Yoyo
Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are. -- Bernice Johnson Reagon
How goes the day? How's the heart? What works best for you?
Is it like the difference between a river roaring down the rocks in the limbo period to emptying into a large basin as the salt water mixes with the fresh creating the ebb and flow of the tide with the divorce?
A different sensation, a different feeling but taking you some place else.. slowly, calmly, gently at times stormy?
*hugs*.. you are wonderful.. I am so happy to know you.
Well I just wanted to say, YOu are pretty darn terrific, and you did awesome.
The reality of it all, it is something that hits some days harder than others.
The thought of settling into this new life, and the thought of doing THIS as a single person, that you never thought you were going to be. Well, it hits hard.
You know what else hits hard:
The wonderful feeling of accomplishment when
you tackled something at home, that you never thought in a million years you would have to tackle. You tackled it and YOU did it.
The overwhelming love you will receive from those precious babies. They will be so in tune to you and your feelings.
That bond of love will only grow.
You will get hit hard in the heart and that is ok. Feel it, own it, mourn it. It means you are human, and your heart is big and wonderful.
Then one day YOU are gonna hit hard back, by saying to yourself when you look in the mirror. He did not break my spirit. He did not change my being. He did not make me into a bitter person. He is only one man.
I am worthy.
HUGS sweetie.
Take it one day at a time.
You are very much cared for, you can see that by the display of affection on your thread. I bet it is just as awesome with your family and friends.
You are being held up by many prayers.
Have a blessed weekend
Last edited by Lissie; 10/17/0805:26 PM.
Live Simply Love Generously Care Deeply Speak Kindly Leave the rest to God
