Yeah he is an asssssssssss--sorry, not nice, I know!
H did his thing again last night. He went out with the customer, got home at 10:30. I was cleaning the kitchen. He went and sat on the couch and turned on the TV. I walked in 5 min later and he was lying down with a blanket on him. Any time he goes out and comes home and lays down, it is a given that he will be asleep in five min. or less.
I started talking to him and he startled, like he was asleep already. I went back to organizing baby clothes and then a minute later I heard him say, "I am going to bed." I said, "OK."
He didn't go to bed, he fell asleep on the couch. I am pissed b/c another night has passed where we spent zero time together. the last time we spent any time alone together was last Saturday night when we were up until 1 am discussing both of our letters and trying to decide what to do about our marriage.
I am soooooo tired of that whole cycle. I don't want our only time together to be spent discussing the pros and cons of being together. Not exactly an enjoyable experience to build on! I remember having FUN times together, where did that go?
He never did get up off the couch. I walked through the room a few times to put things away and he startled every time, so he must have been sleeping lightly...anyway once he said, "What do you need?" as though I had been talking to him. I replied, "When can I have time with you?" H answered, "When do you want to?" I said, "No, when do YOU want to spend time with me?" He asked me when I wanted to again. I stated calmly that I wanted to spend time with him quite often and he was unavailable so I was asking when he would want to spend time with me...He just said whenever you want and rolled over, back to sleep.
H spent the whole night out on the couch. Pisses me off. Both kids came in our bed, I tossed and turned with them for an hour and then put them in their beds. I always sleep like crap if I know he is in the house but not in our bed at night.
Anyway this morning H comes in at 6 a.m. sharp, all dressed for work, and kisses me goodbye. WTF? Again, he either does not remember last night or he is pretending it never happened....Either is possible, I could smell alcohol on his breath when he came in so if they had much to drink he may have crashed and been out of it once he fell asleep the first time...
I am super annoyed b/c I can either continue to ignore the whole thing where I am at the bottom of the list, or I can raise the issue, which always falls on me to do, and we can have another "talk session" which I am not in the mood for. Can someone hit the fast forward button to where I get to have fun with my H again???????????
What would "Do something different" look like in this situation? I have tried ignore and go with the flow which seems to affirm his NOT spending time with me. I have tried raise the issue and talk which leads to, well, talk, and not change....
