Maybe you should tell your H that you understand why he wants to say something to former OM and that you understand his pain. You know that there are consequences for what happened and you will accept whatever he decides to do.

This will put a heavy weight on him. Though you do need to be sincere and realize that he very well may follow through. I tend to think the "weight" may be too much for him.

kat

Me-53(and learning!)
S24, S21, D18, D17
Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory