WAW has been home for 19 weeks now

[GH31]

I travelled to work yesterday with W and went through my conversation with OM. She wasn't happy that I called him when I said I would not; I replied that W had promised not to lie to me anymore and had broken that promise, so I had to get the truth.

I informed W that her actions are deeply hurtful and traumatizing and asked her not to book hotel with OM when he visits next month.

Anyway, last night W did not come home. She didn't tell me or her dad that she was staying out - and then I received this SMS this morning:

I won't be home tonight either. Please don't cook any dinner for me. I will be back late tomorrow

For me this is the last straw. I will move out next week and hand her what Dr. Harley would call a "Plan B letter" and have no contact with her whatsoever. I will change my number and deactivate my email accounts so she cannot reach me, and I will specify the conditions that I require for the marriage to be restored. I love what we had together, but this situation cannot continue.

I called W at work and she told me that she had just wanted "time to herself" to get a breather from "the situation". I joked about OM being in town already but of course, she denied it. I am meeting her for lunch today and will not bring up anything "heavy". She said she wanted to meet me for lunch as long as I was "pleasant". I want her last memories of me to be great - then she will either do whatever it takes to restore trust, love and friendship or we will never see or communicate with each other again.

I know this will be gut-wrenching but it must be done. I will not sit around at home having dogsh1t wiped on me any more. My father in England wants me to go over there and stay, and I am very tempted to do just this. I have also been offered a job in Munich which I would like to start soon. WW will have tremendous difficulty getting to me there but if she does then at least I know she is serious.

I have been at this for nine months and endured some searing psychological abuse. I feel satisfied that I have done everything I can so far to save my marriage.