Running around the wilderness sounds good right now...
I overreacted to something last night. Did something I don't usually do, owned up to it and apologized this morning. H responded by saying "Thanks for thinking of me, we can talk about it tonight". Now I feel like I am headed for the principal's office...................
What happened was I had class last night. Got out early b/c prof wanted to go home and watch the debate (so did I!). Got home at 8:30, I could hear H reading to the kids in their beds. (We are working on a firm 8:30 in bed time!)
So I went directly downstairs and folded laundry while watching the debate. I came up a few times to put laundry away, H was still in their bedroom. Finished laundry around 9, H came out of the bedroom a few minutes before that and was on the couch. H thanked me for going downstairs when I got home, the previous week I walked in talking loudly on my cell phone and both kids got all riled up b/c Mommy was home...it wrecked the bed time routine.
Anyway, H was on the couch watching South Park. I haven't watched in ages and normally find it pretty much adolescent humor but I admit it had some funny points...I was upstairs maybe 15 minutes or so. Then H got up and said he was going to bed, he was exhausted. I knew he was tired, he says all the time he cannot sleep (depression, anyone??).
So I should have just said goodnight but I pouted like a brat b/c he didn't offer to dialogue, we have dialogued once in 2 weeks other than our long dialogue over the weekend, which I initiated. Anyway I was on a BJ pity party b/c he didn't want to spend time with me, dialogue with me, etc, just wanted to go to bed. Then he said if you want to spend time w/me, then come to bed too. I was bitchy and said if he'd wanted me to come to bed he'd have said so in the first place and that I wouldn't be spending time with him if his plan was to fall right to sleep...
Long story, sorry, point is H was exhausted and wanted to go to bed. I took it as an insult b/c he had managed to work, go to the farm, and play with the kids but when I finally was available he was too tired. This morning I e-mailed that I was being selfish and that if he was tired he should be able to go to bed without me making a big deal about it.
He said its okay, thanks for worrying about me, we can talk more tonight.
I know I was being an immature brat, it is just frustrating that he always finds time for other things besides me......
