Hello MsMel. I know you are lurking out there. What's up with you?
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Hey Coach, Not much is up with me. Had a really busy week at work. Yesterday, my childhood friend & her husband flew in to town. (He's running in the marathon here tomorrow). So I have been busy entertaining & will be until Tues. My computer is also upstairs where they are sleeping, so very little time online for me.
Not much new on the H front. Sounds like he "might" have time to help w/Halloween decorations. But he is working long hours & is a chauffer to his best friend (the company owners son) - who is on work release from jail for DWI. I'm just hoping (bad to say) - but hoping he will get tired of being a chauffer. So I'm laying low & not being demanding.
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
Well, today is my 2nd year anniversary of being M. I bought myself some flowers for the occasion. Last week I emailed my H about doing dinner tonight. He said he would call me ..... never happened ....... and I didn't think he really would call. He left me a year & 2 months ago. Probably checked out of the M then. I do believe this is the end of DBing for me & my marriage. I just really don't care anymore. I'm tired & he's not worth it. I love my H - always will - but just don't want to be M to him anymore. I have been detatching so well - but am hurting today.
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
(((MSMel)))) Sorry I missed this. It's Ok to hurt, nothing about this is good. What are you doing for yourself these days? Is your house already decorated for Halloween? I got your mesage on FB but I can't get on FB lately. Call if you want. I owe you a shoulder to cry on. Take care of yourself.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Hey Coach, Thanx for stopping by I miss your posts. But you are working on your life as well you should.
My post & my state of mind was not helped by having a couple of drinks ....ooppps. I'm doing better.... bouncing back again. Maybe I need to read that book you mentioned.
Forrest mentioned something on another thread about seeing the others point of view. I understand .... I understand ....but I'm tired of seeing my H's view ... what about me & my point of view??? Strange in a talk H & had earlier, he mentioned that even if we get D - we could still work on our M or R. Unless he has changed how He deals w/things - it wouldn't change much & I wouldn't want an R with him. What's the point so he could run away & not talk to me again when things get tough??
Been thinking about my cheesetunnels. The one thing I haven't been is a total b*tch. I have also thought about dropping some of his things off at his house. I could use the storage space so maybe I should drop the gravel & garden trains & other non essentials he left here. Or I was thinking of asking a male friend if he would help me load up some of my H's bigger furniture items here & deliver them w/me in his truck.
My H makes it seem he wants to be free of me .... so maybe I should cut the cord & give him his freedom & happiness.
For me what have I been doing. Well, I put up outside Halloween decorations by myself this weekend. I did a pretty good job - if I don't say so myself - had fun too. Inside .. I'm still working on it. I received my new, used laptop today & was excited to use it. So far I am happy as it seems a lot faster than my other. Now my H can have that slow piece of sh*t that takes 15 minutes to start up if you turn it off. And that is no lie.
Thank you again ... I still hurt ... but you know how it goes. The pains dies away & you begin to wonder ....
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
I totally understand that, I have felt that frustration. You matter, I'll listen.
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What's the point so he could run away & not talk to me again when things get tough??
Know that one too. Trust issue. When the time comes to trust again, do it for yourself. I can help you thru that.
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The one thing I haven't been is a total b*tch. [/quote ] That's good but are you getting your feelings out?
[quote] My H makes it seem he wants to be free of me .... so maybe I should cut the cord & give him his freedom & happiness.
Are you asking or telling me?
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The pains dies away & you begin to wonder ....
So what are you wondering about?
Take care of yourself. Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I miss your posts. But you are working on your life as well you should.