Sandi is here and things are getting better!

[OnTheEdge22]

Sandi - I'm so glad you had this conversation with him. I would do anything for my W to sit me down and tell me the things you said.

I just hope I can keep my spirits up and that you all will try to encourage me. You see, I know that my H is a good man, but since he doesn't talk very much then I begin to "think" this or to "think" that about the situation. It usually isn't good.

I'll definitely be here to encourage you. I can't tell you how long my W and I had been quiet, assuming things about the other or "thinking" this and that. I can't tell you how important it is to verbalize this over and over again. Sometimes I think we men are really like dogs -- you just have to keep pounding it into them over and over again before they'll actually do something!!!

I think I was lying to myself b/c I kept waiting for the feelings to show up and they wouldn't and that kept me pulled down.

This is my W exactly. She's in that same place and won't work on anything because she doesn't "feel" that way towards me anymore. Boy I wish she could talk to you or read some of your sitch -- she would so clearly identify with it.

But I am going to start calling him out about things he says or does instead of letting it turn into resentment. I did talk to him about how I had done that for sooooo many years, but I did not get off into any particular areas.

This is what got us the WAW's section in the first place, right? So, its great to hear you say that. Good 180!!!

Sandi - I'm really happy for you and hope this continues to move your R forward. I can always use some of your good advice, so stop by my thread sometime. Talk to you soon!