I empathize and can relate to wondering when it is over. I still hurt and I was separated in 2001 and divorced in 2005. Remarried in 2007 and still find the memories of my D painful.... however... I have largely moved on and the pain is less and less as years go by.
So I do know the malingering pain.
For me, I had to find something outside of myself and my circumstances to plug into and focus my energies on. Maybe you could benefit from something outside of your home life.
Was there drugs or alcohol involved in your D? If so, how about joining Alanon Family Groups or NarAnon? As one of the other replies mentions, you may have characteristics of co-dependency. Alanon and NarAnon are support groups of people with addicts and alcoholics in their lives or past. Most people in these groups have recovered from co-dependent behaviour and thinking.
There are tons of 12-step programs out there for many types of circumstances. Even over-eaters anonymous is tremendously helpful for those who are inclined that way so perhaps check local directories for anything that may be relevant in support groups. Live support groups with real people who can support you face to face. This online dialogue is limited in my experience. I find one-to-one more effective.
Isolating is never good for any of us who are prone to depression. I used to do it all the time when I was in the thick of my depression. Even now, I seek to be alone many times when I am depressed. Or seek to hide in videos or TV or sleep. These are all temptations that I actively avoid wherever possible when I feel depressed.
So my suggestion would be to look outward. Get personally involved with others. Healthy people on the same journey.
If you are prone to Church at all, there is a group called Divorce Care that is a support group for divorced people in most communities in North America.
If you are chronically alone, it may be wise to ask some rigorously honest questions about what choices you make and behaviours you engage in that keep you alone. Changes in your life cannot happen without you doing most of the work. Lots of people will support and guide you but you have to do the doing!
Another reply suggested considering outside couneling. Great idea as well.
In the mean time, we are here for you. It will not likely be enough, but we will do what we can. There is lots of help out there. Only you can take the steps to seek it out.
Will believe the best for you and check back on this thread.
