As I feel so mixed up , I am going to try to sort out what i feel.
Is it worthless, valued, hated, loved, etc etc.
I think I needed to waffle in order to help get order.
and also
Quote:
Trouble is - and I feel this daily - if you dont really get to the bottom of why you thought you could have an A you will do it again.
I can pin loads of reasons but i think i am not understanding it. I have no family history of this immoral behaviour. where did it come from ? Is it my h fault ( his inability to communicate - to understand me - to love me the way i need to be loved ) Why the hell should he take any blame ?
End of the day - I made a concious decision .
Could you be someone who isn't feeling completely confident in herself? Is it possible you seek out others to "make you happy", whether your husband or some other guy?
Could it be that this separation is the time where you figure out how to make yourself happy, without another man? And then if you have a new relationship you will be starting from a stronger base.
Check out the book - "Passionate Marriage". The writing style is obtuse but the points it makes are very good. What I took away: To be a good partner in a marriage, you need to be independently strong. You need to be happy with yourself.
