Be careful you don't rebound!!

[TwinDragon]

Hey, I'm the first. Pass me a glass of Riesling, ice cold if you please.

First let me say, that I had the rebound relationship and like most it didn't work out. And because she was a rebound, I didn't see the red flags that I should have. But, I found that she is what I needed at the time to help me grow.

How do we get caught in a rebound?

Some people figure if it's ok for him why not me?
Some are desperate to know that they are attractive after all.
Some just desperately need to feel needed.
Others just want to feel something - anything at all!

I think I had a little of each of these reasons in my rebound. Also, it was nice to have someone like me and want to be with me.

I think that if you are using these reasons, you are not ready for dating. You need to be stronger than that to make it work.

Also part of what you need to consider are the kids. You may have decided that you are ready to date but honestly are your kids ready to have other adults introduced into the mix?

I agree highly with this statement. I had to chuckle when I was dating my rebound. My D8 said to me one day after I had been dating for 3 months, "Dad, you love me and I love you." I said, "Yes." She said, "Sissy loves you and you love her." Again, I said, "Yes." She said, "I love sissy and she loves me." I said, "Yes." She said, "That's a whole lot of love, I guess we have enough for you to love 'rebound'". I knew at that time that my kids were ready and would accept a new woman in my life. So the kids will let you know when they are ready. I believe that you should wait till after 3 months of being serious to introduce the kids and serious is not first sex. It is serious when you start thinking about a future and maybe marriage.

Some horror stories: My rebound was hoping I wouldn't get custody, so once I did she left soon after. Since then, I've gone out on a few dates. One had a serious drinking problem. One ended up dying due to a complication from surgery. One was just looking for multiple friends with benefits, had been in a 24 year marriage and had not been with any other man than her husband. One said she loved me at the end of first date and wanted to move in with me.

Hoping for success: Well, I am currently dating a lady and I am very optomistic about this one.

Ok, well. I hope I added to the fun.

TD