I can say "ditto" for most everything you wrote above. My H sounds a lot like your XH.
I have written several threads and posted my whole story even describing me and the OW. If you feel like an interesting read, click on some of my previous posts. I have only been posting since early July and sure do wish I found this site months and months ago. My chances would have been better I think.
Oh naej, you might want to be cozy with a hot cup of tea or a cocktail. I will warn you it's quite a story.
I am in Maine, I am just going to fix some supper.
We are having a beautiful fall here in New England and I spent the day outside so I am hoping the sun and fresh air will make me sleep well. It's not something I am getting a lot of right now.
I know you will read this in the am....I hope you had a good night's sleep.
With appreciation for being my friend,
Sanderika
ME48/H48MLC T 33y M 28y S16 OW 8/7/05 Bomb 8/16/05 Sep 9/05 H f'd D 10/3/08 D pp'd 1/20/09,7/24/09,12/4/09 D dismissed 2/5/10 H served me D papers again 9/4/10 D dismissed 9/26/11