well for us there was a long seperation with no support orders in place, lots of 401k money that was spent, lots of hiddend money...but to go to trial over it would have ate up all that was left.....so yes what i mean is when u seperate protect yourselr i lost so much money in support becuase becuase my attorney told me they wont go back until the orders are placed...my orders werent even placed until dec after i retain the darn attonrey in july..before that there was two years of seperation where i had hoped he would return so basically 3 1/2 years from bomb time until divorce final....and until 12/07 no support orders...i had to use savings to live, he used savings and hide some too...so I am dumb dumb dumb at the time I could not believe he would be a man who would leave his family...i thought hes in mlc..but he will wake up...now he does look miseraable....but in the mean time, our life savings is gone....thats all i mean by protect what u have dont do what i did....i was so thinking if I file for leagal seperation that will just make him so mad....and one more thing to overcome. Now he makes twice I what I do, for much of the marriage I worked two jobs....long story but lets just say I alwasy worked and now his career advances finally after all these years about 5 years ago now and then he leaves....I guess he didnt need my money anymore...it is so hard to come out of this not feeling totally used and foolish...but I do believe that we all answer for what we do at some point and I dont think dumping your wife and family whoe were good to you...gets you many points in the end...oh well let go or be dragged now he gets to find out how green the grass is....he sure looks unhappy to me..thats the weird part that i cant figure out....they look so miserable but they still move forward with the decision to destroy the family
