(((Dan)))! You are handling things pretty well. I'm so sorry for your pain. But, I'm also very hopeful for your future. Now that you are out of limboland, you can really start planning that. It will be good.
And, given what you know now, you can teach your children lots about avoiding this pain. That doesn't mean they won't have other trials...life's full of those! But, you can teach them what you've learned, and that's tremendous. Don't lose sight of that.
Take care...I'll be keeping an eye on you!!!
Amy
Me 39 H 36 S 7 S 4 T 15 M 12 H out 8/1/08 OW confirmed 8/6/08 D final on 6/12/09...I'm doing good!
(((Dan))) You are so strong, and will come out of this stronger. I think many of us will look back to these years, and be in awe of how much pain we endured, and how much we grew.
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
"I feel like we were trains on parallel paths and wondering why there were no connections. I loved her and she loved me and the other didn't receive it. I hurt her and she hurt me and neither meant it" -
MinM - I can relate to this feeling - it must have been the hardest thing in the world to break the cycle - but you've made the move and now there's a world of possibilities. You seem so measured and level headed about it...hard to achieve but that will stand you well!
Best - GFI
Me: 40ish W: 40ish Together: 20 ish years Married: 10ish Years
Ugh, how could I get that messed up on that little alcohol. I wonder if emotional distress doesn't twist our bodies around in ways we don't normally think about.
I called Mom and she came and watched the kids and I went out drinking and having fun and somewhere between the beginning and the end I had I think 4 shots of tequila and 3 beers. I ended the night slumped over in a booth sick. Sitting on the bench out front with my head in my hands. Ferried to the eating establishment where I sat at the table with my head in my hands. Then back to get my car and off to my friend's friend's house for a couple of hours of sleep and detox until I was able to drive home.
7 drinks in 3 hours just doesn't seem like that much, but, in either case, I'm swearing off alcoholic beverages for the forseeable future. Maybe if I ever have a nice dinner date, I'll have a glass of wine, but, no more drinking at the bar. Ugh.
I don't suppose that has anything to do with DBing, but, you all are friends and this way, you all know that I'm still alive and kicking and that's a good thing too.
Going to talk to the W today. She is bringing over the goldfish for my son's birthday and to get it set up. I feel like I have to ask one last time if we really are so screwed up that we can't fix things and find a way to reconnect on the same path. Probably not, but, it certainly can't hurt to ask.
I would imagine that the emotional hurt has physically caused your stomach to betray you. And your not 20 anymore - getting drunk to the point of getting sick is a lot tougher to recover from than when you were younger. Maybe it is better to drink on a full stomach of food.
I would like to see a graph of all the ages of people on this site. It sure seems that there are quite a few right around you and your W's age.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
If he moves his next thread over to "Surviving the Big D", he is going to find that a good number of people over there pass around the cyber spirits quite a bit.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
