A little eye leakage this morning. I drove past her place and his place this morning(0300) to check and yes, her car was at his place. It smelled like she had it cleaned professionally, I'm hopeful that perhaps the smoking was something that the other guy did and she is quitting. That doesn't really effect me and what I decide, but, for her and for my peace when she is around the kids, it's better if she doesn't smoke.
I don't want this. I meant my vows. I'm reminded of when Jesus said to the Pharisees that provision was made for divorce because of the hardness of men's hearts, but, I can't reconcile that with the pain of being cast aside. I have to do this, but, I will remain to a small degree open to her. The difference is that I'm not going to wait for her or pursue her in fact I will do the opposite, but, if she were chasing, I'd stop and consider.
