Homeward Bound!

[pisces9]

Hi All

H and I are doing really well. We have had a few rough days here and there..but mostly really back on track.

when i say rough- it is just learning how to communicate and not slip back into old patterns. i am very clear with my needs ...but I try to not overdo it and overload him with nagging...I just make sure I ask for what I need. then I move on.

We are buying a house (great deal)...so this is all progressing. His fears came up a bit and i just let him sit with them for a few days... and express them a bit. I didnt try to stop him from having them....or pry...

I also was able to say my fears and say where i am with our M. Also-I have been struggling a bit with my detachment from my brother/family still- as he has been so mean and critical and actually vicious with his language about me and my husbands choices...

so i have learned to not include him in much and really separate from him as much as possible- without a total disconnect. thats a hard pill to swallow- but very needed and healthy.

my H has said very small things about having kids in the future...and he being the providor...its amazing! he is really growing into a MAN before my eyes- with a few setbacks..but i have had a few as well.. a little snappy at him, etc. and recovered it quickly- but it just felt gross..

he has only said our little pet name for ILY- not the full fledged words yet- and he STILL has his apt - that he never goes to! but i think he will get rid of it this week as we are buying a house..we are doing that bc we own the current one w my bro and its too uncmfy in that sitch.

another great thin is we are planing a backpacking trip over xmas- just us away from it all! i am so excited and so is he- we did a trial 6 mile hike today! yeesh !!! we connect best in nature and the outdoors being active..

anywho- im trying to catch up with all of you....miss you all!

Please take care of yourselves.. i am learning I have to keep that up- the GAL, PMA is sometimes easy to forget! But that is the #1 most important tool from all this DB'ing....

XO XO XO P!