Okay, so I loved Kristine! She was great and very good at getting you to talk. H also loved her and said he thought she was "real".
So the session was interesting....we both kind of went over our history together from our own respective positions and she then asked questions. She told H her read on him was that he didn't really think our R had a good chance of making it, but that he also wasn't saying "no way, nuh uh, never...not gonna happen" either. He agreed with her. He told her us having sex with eachtoher was confusing for him as it made him feel like we were still in a relationship and that is something he is trying to avoid. She asked him if he enjoyed it...he said yes...she said "you are both consenting adults...sex may be repairative for both of you". Her advice on that was to go ahead with it as long as we both wanted it, but advised us that we should be honest with eachother if anyone else was in the picture as we each had the right to know from a protecting ourselves perspective. She also said, we should NOT talk about the past at all. She said our relationship is at a point where constant rehashing of our issues is only going to seal the deal and she told me that although she knew I wanted affirmation that if I kept bothering H I may push him in to a premature decision that would ultimately be no at this point. She asked H if he was willing to date me and he said NO! She asked what time we spent together then. We said, we basically see eachother when he drops D off. She asked what those visits were like. H said when I'm not bugging him about R, we talk about normal stuff. She asked what he thought of that....he said he enjoyed it and it was "nice". She then asked me what I thought and I said I enjoyed his company and I knew I put pressure on him about the R. She asked what I meant. I told her I keep asking for some kind of positive comment from him and that I flirt with him. Again, she asked him if the flirting bothered him and he said, it confused him because he doesn't know why I never did it before and he just thinks I'm trying to reel him back in so I can just hurt him again...he then said my flirting did make him feel good though and went on to say that the sex we've had since we've been separated is the best we've ever had. Our session ran over by 30 minutes! At any rate, at the end she asked us what we wanted to do in terms of using her services. Before I could open my mouth, H said he wanted to come back and talk with her and we have another appointment scheduled for next Wednesday!
Gosh, I hope we can both get past this awful time in our lives. I am going to really try to stop from bringing up the R...it helps to know I will have my time to discuss it next Wednesday.
