Wow, I have not posted in months. I need to take a look around and see who is still here. A couple people have emailed me and I've wanted to log in for weeks. Here's a synopsis for anyone around who remembers me.
1 - H "quit" drinking in June. Not because of anything I said or did. But because his boss had a talk with him. His boss said he could smell alcohol on him all the time. This was a Friday morning. When I got home he finally told me. I knew something was wrong. He started crying. It was a few minutes before he could talk and I was sitting there thinking, OMG he got another DWI or he's decided to move out. He finally told me what happened and that he was going to quit drinking. He said he had talked to several people and knew it was going to be rough. It turns out the 'several people' he talked to was OW.
I was really upset by that. He got an ultinatum from his boss, to quit drinking or lose his job and he couldn't even call me. It was a rough weekend. He was really sick. Throwing up, fever, chills, DTs. I thought he was going to end up in the hospital. I ran to a health food store and got some vitamins and protein supplements that were recommended on the internet.
He didn't pick up a beer for about 2-3 weeks. Then, he slowly started drinking again. A beer or two a night. And now, he's not as bad as he was. But he's close.
2 - I went through horrible depression because of his quitting drinking. That may not make sense but I read that's actually when spouses of alcoholics do leave! He was stone cold sober which made him quiet, withdrawn, etc. We like to sit on our patio and enjoy our patio chimney whenever we could. We'd sit out there for a few hours and he'd hardly say anything. I'd try to talk about different things and it was like talking to myself. I had myself convinced that he didn't want to be with me. I was ready to throw in the towel.
2 - His court case is STILL pending. At the last status hearing, his lawyer asked that the DWI be dismissed. For months they have asked for key evidence and gotten nothing. The judge agreed, but apparently it's may not be dismissed after all. He's not sure what is going on.
3 - OW is still in the picture but not as much. She's been fairly quiet for about 2 months. But in late spring, early summer she was still making her angry phone calls. Some of them were really bad. One night, in June, when my D15 was at camp, she kept at it until 1 a.m. I called in sick to work the next day. I didn't sleep because of her calls, and the nasty messages she left. It was horrible.
4 - H is trying to maintain a friendly relationship with her because of the court case but she makes it challenging. He says she's always trying to pick fights. He surprised the h3ll out of me one night because he made the comment that now he could see that it was a relationship built on 'fun' - but that's all it was. The weekend trips on his bike wasn't reality. I could have fallen on the floor. In my mind I could hear the Hallelujah chorus sounding loud and clear!!
Overall, we're doing ok. Yeah, he's drinking again, the court case is still pending so in some ways it's same-o same-o, but there's definitely been some improvement.
