Don't apologize for being testy. You are right. I guess I'm still stuck in the mode of trying to make things go smoothly b/t XW and myself. The problem is there is nothing I can do that will make her less angry w/ me.
I would like to finish the conversation and I guess, instead of getting snippy like I did today, I need to learn how to calmly tell her to either stop criticizing me or we need to end this conversation. I'm not sure how to handle it, but I do know I'm growing as I didn't apologize to XW and I'm completly correct w/ what I told Grace as well as how it was said to her.
I have ZERO guilt and shame about any of it. I'm just being hard on myself b/c I want to be better than that. I don't want to have her be able to get under my skin. I know it is a process that involves a life style change and I'm just barely starting the journey.
I'm looking forward to talking w/ Jody tomorrow even though she'll be a bit mad at me for lashing out w/ my comment about XW's affair. However, the great thing is she'll tell me how to deal w/ XW from now on -- that is what I really want to learn so I can continue to work on freeing myself completely.
