It has been forever since I have posted here. So, long that I could not even remember my old password and the email I used is dead now - so, I have to create a new login. My old name was "Geekspeak" though I am not sure how many old timers are still around here - Hairdog?

I decided to come back here because my relationship has taken a weird turn and I wanted to hear some feedback from some other people who share a lot of the same concerns as myself.

This post could go on for about 5 pages, but I will try to be brief and give you a quick history and then tell you about my current situation.

= HISTORY =
I am a HD male married 20+ years to a LD female. We have two teenagers. Our sex life comes and goes but never goes lower than once a month and never more than 3-4 times a month. I would prefer 2x a week.

= CURRENT SITUATION =
I have a full time 40hr week job. I also own a business on the side. I have been doing this business on the side for 10 years (pretty much a hobby). Now the business has taken off like wild fire. I do not want to leave my full time job because I enjoy it and the benefits are great. I have hired assistants to help with my business. This of course takes lots of time and causes a lot of stress for me trying to make my clients happy.

I still have time to spend with my family and wife. The problem is that I have pretty much given up on initiating sex. Not that I don't WANT sex. It's just that my wife is usually not positive about initiation. It pretty much goes one of two ways... if she wants it and I initiate we are okay. If she does not want it we usually end up grumpy or fighting because of something I "did wrong" - asked at the wrong time, asked too quick, did this wrong, did that too late, etc. So, I end up looking at a desk of projects and asking myself. Gee, I would like to have sex tonight... but, can I afford to give up 2-3 hours if I get a "No" answer and then have to deal with hurt feelings for days???

So, I was just about to confront my wife on the issue - and she beat me to it.

We're sitting on the couch and she just pops off and says "I want you to ask me for sex every night for the next year! and if I don't like how you ask... you're sleeping on the couch..."

So... you can imagine the head jerk reaction from me... WHAT?! but of course... she does not want to talk about it... you know... it's not a discussion... just go with it... do it...

So, I'm having pretty mixed emotions about this...

Great! I get to initiate sex every night... I could really use the practice... I have never been good at this...

CRAP! I'm going to get rejected 300 times this year...

Great! I'm probably going to get sex more times this year...

CRAP! Who is she to set all these rules and tell me the man of the house that I'll be sleeping on the couch???

So, it's been about 6 nights now...

The first night I got lucky and we had sex...

The next night went well, she said she was tired... I was too... everybody is happy.

Then, the third night I "didn't do it right" and I felt like just going to the couch to get away from her... instead she insisted (not in a nice way) that I try again and again until she was happy with my attempt (yet, the answer was still no to sex)

I was out of town for two days so we got a break from her game.

Then, I returned and we had a crappy fight about nothing important. So, there I am thinking "crap, we don't even like each other right now and I have to initiate sex!?!?!" So, I did my best attempt and it was decent and she accepted it as a valid attempt...said no thanks and we went to bed.

So, is this pretty weird or what?

oh, she also got onto me one of those nights because "I was doing the same thing I had done the first night when I initiated" - so, now what? I have to come up with something UNIQUE 365 days?