W still taking stuff out of the house, doesn't bother me, she is working on cleaning out the entertainment center. I pulled down all of our wedding pictures and every picture of us together in the house about a month ago and put them in the bottom of the entertainment center. She took all of them but left photo album of our wedding proofs. I've been boxing up stuff that I don't want for her to take with her and I'm going to put the wedding proofs in there for her to take with her.
I had a bad dream last night, woke up at 4:00 am screaming mad. In my dream I was with my W outside a strange house and she went in. A man appeared and she looked like she was going to kiss him but instead looked at me outside the door, she then did kiss him. I was banging on the door trying to get in to go after the OM but I couldn't get in, I was screaming and banging on the door, then I woke up.
When am I going to get this crap out of my head. I laid in bed praying to God that he ends my torture and helps me move on. That brings someone else into my life, that I find love again.
I'm being polite to W, we are planning D6 and D6 birthday what we are getting them, etc. We are discussing our schedules for the month, W tells me about every little penny she spends on the kids (I never say anything) I wish I didn't have to deal with stbx but because of the kids I have a life sentence with her
Favorite part of my day going to go pick up the kids they remind me of 4 little baby birds sitting in a nest all chirping for the worm, when we get home its the same thing I'm hungry, I want this or I want that. D9 and I are going to make banana bread tonight, homework, baths, reading to S5 dinner, dishes, folding laundry is what I have waiting for me and I'm happy about it because they are with me
W41 M10.75 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 W files for D 07/18/08
