Lifeline has to actually face her H and this forum is where she can get support as well as the negative side of her A. She will sit with her H and have to take his venom and hurt and pain and agression and frustration and depression and saddness and betrayal and face them all IN HER HUSBAND. That is where it counts. She does not need forgiveness from us, but from him. If she is still being defensive about blaming him for the A, then she really is not ready for a repair of the R or M. In the heat of an argument she blurts out his faults, then all this mea culpa is really just more pablum she is spreading to get some online support for why she "deserves" to be forgiven by her H.
But since he is acting hurt, agressive, despondent, etc (all a symptoms of his hurt and betrayal) even after she has made a "sincere" apology, then this must also be his fault for not forgiving her.
Blaming your husband in the midst of an argument for your adultery means you still blame him for all of it and have little or no real remorse. Consequences can be really crappy sometimes.
