Hope4us struggle, part 9 or 10 or whatever

[Hope4us]

Thanks DMB, Long time, no talk. How's things in your sitch? Email me with an update. I was thinking about you a couple days ago wondering what was going on.

Things at home are still pretty decent, but I do have one dilema I'd like everyone's opinions on.

The last couple days, W has been very up and down. She's PMS'ing so I kind of expected it. Mostly up with an occasional down time. The down times haven't been near as bad as they were even a couple months ago, but something happened yesterday and I'd like to know what you all think.

Yesterday while W and S16 were on the way to drop him off at school they were talking. W talks very softly and S16 couldn't hear her. He asked what she had said and W snapped at him repeating what she'd said in a really loud voice. S16 reached down and turned the radio off, I guess a little more strongly than W liked so she smacked him on the leg and started bi*chin at him. S16 told me he didn't say a word to her the rest of the trip and then last night he was pretty cold to her. W did apologize to him in the only way she knows how to apologize, that is, she never told him she was sorry, but tried to be nicey, nicey with him and dance around the subject without admitting she'd done anything wrong (which is pretty standard for her).

So then last night, S16 says to me he doesn't want to join the Ski/Snow board club at school like he was talking about and this morning W is bit*hin at me because he now doesn't want to join. I just told her she'd have to talk to him about it.

So here is the question. I want to call her on her behavior and let her know it's unacceptable. S16 told me for the first time in his life he felt like his mother hated him with the way she treated him yesterday. BUT.....when I asked S16 how he would feel about me discussing it with W he told me he didn't want me to.

What do I do? Do I let W get away with it without any mention or do I break the trust between S16 and I and talk to her about it anyway? I asked S16 at least 3 times if he wanted me to talk to her about it and he said NO.

So, what do I do?