I guess it's over

[Dom R]

I hope Dom is still hanging around because I am very curious to hear a little bit more about his idea.

okiedoke

I will "compare and contrast" what Jody suggested for you, compared to what I wrote. (or at least, my limited view on what Jody must be suggesting for you)

Jody is presumably suggesting the "let things cool off, let him come to his senses, let him pursue you" track. And eventually, if you keep "playing hard to get", but still being semi-available to him, perhaps he will come closer to where you would like him to be.
[inch by inch, in a coupla years. maybe. that's my personal comment there ]

In contrast, I'm saying "time for hard-core plan B for you". This is it. The line in the sand. The "shape up, or ship out" boundary. "This is what it takes to be with Trixi. If you arent interested in actually putting in some WORK for me, then you dont deserve me. buh-bye".

Seems fairly clear that the "wait for him to wake up by himself" tack, doesnt have much lasting effect on him at this point, though. Either because he's just too greedy, or becuase you cant bring yourself to be consistently "hard to get".
I dont think you're that kind of person. I think that YOU will benefit from setting down some rules, because then if he agrees to them, you will be able to point to the rules, and things will be clear.

I also think that it will be easier for you, to stick to the "dont talk to him until he agrees to the ground rules" method, than for you to play hard to get.
It protects YOU, from getting hurt over and over again, when he half-way approaches you, and you get your hopes up and cave in again.. and again...and again...

That's what a "plan B" is really for.



As a side comment, You wrote earlier, something like you worry that you'd "never be able to find someone to match him".
ARE YOU KIDDING??? He's a SCHMUCK. He may be a charming schmuck, but he's still a schmuck.

There are nice guys out there, and they would jump at the chance to find a kind, available woman like yourself, with NO CHILDREN. 90% of available women at your age, have children to deal with. You dont, so you are automatically ahead of the pack there
Most men will run away from a woman with children. Or at least, run away from LIVING WITH/MARRYING such a woman. Have sex with em? fine... but not a true relationship, in their book.

I read somewhere, that one of the biggest causes of 2nd romance/marriage failing, is actually children from a "prior relationship". So, you'd have it easy there.



Aaaanyway...
You've tried the "be enticing, gently, and let him wander around and show appreciation for you" approach that Jody suggests.
(although you chased after him too much before).
Didnt seem to work, from my viewpoint.
Unless you can figure out why it didnt work before, and figure out how you have the power to "make it different, this time"... sounds like you should do something different now?



There now. I replied to you again. Hope you're happy. We'll see how much damage this has done to my situation in a few days, I suppose



Hope you manage to sell some houses. Tough gig right now.