WAW - Possible MLC I need help, WAWs advice

[thrillisgone]

LD - I know what you are going through. I understand the sleepless nights, losing weight, the stress of carrying the world on your shoulders. I understand the shock and the fear of losing something that means the world to you. You didn't ask for this.

Alot of what people tell you will seem counterintuitive. Letting go is the best option for you. She has to see that you let go in order to contemplate what the consequences of her actions might mean. Calling her and doing her brakes etc, sends the wrong message. It means you are there for her even when she is betraying her wedding vows, destroying a family and hurting someone who deeply loves her. This is unacceptable behavior.

My ExW uttered the phrase " I guess you won't be able to wait on me" She did this about a week before she left. I had no idea what that meant at the time. Still don't. Perhaps she had visions of returning one day. It has been a long and difficult 7 months since she left. I never let go and she knows it and knew it the whole time she was out partying and having an affair. I drew the line at her signing the divorce papers. She signed them. I believe she had painted herself into such a tight corner she had no choice. I say this because I spoke to her the night before the divorce was granted and the next day I saw her in person. She was an absolute physical and emotional wreck. She was in a far worse place than me.

The door for me is closed tight and locked. I'm moving on. If I had DB'd better, sooner, I might have been able to avert this mess. I believe the signals I sent her enabled her to continue her behavior the point of no return.

If I don't have more self respect than that what woman would ever want me? This has been a tremendous growing and learning experience for me. Don't make the same mistakes I did. Work on you and let freakin' go.