Sounds like you had a Freudian slip and really will continue to blame your husband for your own moral turpitude. All you did was try to win an argument and be hurtful to your husband and twist the knife a bit deeper and harder. You still have not accepted the fact that trust and fidelity were tossed in the dumpster by you.
Your husband did not crawl into another man's bed. Your husband did not remove your panties for another man. Your husband did not concoct lies and deceptions.
When he yells and vents his anger and frustration, suck it up. Allow him to express himself and free himself from the anger. It will pass in time, hopefully.
You did more damage than you can possibly ever know. It is not your place to try to justify your actions.
