Vee: it is sad to know whings arent easy for you... please post me a link for your post just to let me share your situation and maybe some advices...I can tell you that i used to share with my therapist the feelings and concepts we share in this forum, and he was always a little negated to accept all their bad behavior and mistakes bc a crisis... and that the most important is to beguin us a new life, our own independence, to work on us, trying not to excuse them bc the crisis all the hurt and sadnes they throw on us... I dont know why but i cntinue visiting this site, and i continue the therapy at the same time, catching the best from each part for my situation. Each M and each R is unique, so sometimes what function for one, or the result of one R not necessarily has to be the result or what function for other M or R. But what function for every hurted part is to care about us, to beguin a new life, to love ourself more.... i will wait for your link About my situation... So, my h used to climb the mountain each afternooon and me too... Since this mondaym, although h use to get up the mountain alone, without me, and in a rapidly march compare with my time, since monday he had asked me if i am going to get up, etc...?... so, this made me feel cautious os suspicaus...!!... yesterday, he again asked me by phone if i was going to the mountain and i said no bc i had a work meeting... But i finish early that meeting and decide to go, withput callling him... When i was going down,we met (he was going up). He was with a lady (not a pretty one), he made a stop to give me a kiss and say hello and both continued our march (he upside, me down). Bc all the past is sad to maintain in us a doubt... and yes, there was a doubt on me... but at the same time i know that in sport he met many women and he had presented me many friends from running, gym or mountaing activities... So, why doubting... SHE WAS ONLY A FRIEND...!! and he wasnt nervus or afraid when he met me...!! and he has to be so stupid to get up the mountain with someone, mostly bc there are plenty of people who knows both...!! So, he arrived home, i didnt ask him nothing about the lady, just showing him i feel was XXX women... and not an important one...!.. and not showing him jealus or doubts about him...!!... he was so affective, normal, so... Open eyes, controling myself, and nothing more... i hope there will be a time when this doubts get away forever... Could it be...?... who knows... it was so intense and hurting what we had lived... but at the same time i know a R cant be rebuild tellling them each time we have doubts,bc that returns us to the past, and we are constructing the future... On friday is his birthday and today at night we will share a magnificant music cncert with our oldest kids... He is always so affective, comunicative, lovely... thats whats counts... Andrea
