Okay, I could really be way off base with this, but I'm gonna say it anyway and pray you don't take offense. Is it possible your wife is questioning the basis of her sexuality. In other words is she maybe thinking she may be attracted to women? I don't know why I'm reading things this way and you can tell me to shut up or that I'm way off base, but I am taking from what you said that you maybe weren't the most "skilled" lover during your marriage and that as a result wife didn't have an opportunity to get really turned on. Is that true? If so, is it possible this woman she associates with and she have had some kind of experience that did turn her on? They do say a woman knows what a woman wants. I'm wondering if her comments to you about how she wants sex but isn't attracted to you are out of confusion and frustration. Maybe something is coming alive in her and she wishes you could be the one to satisfy her?
Okay so here is where I could be giving you really bad advice. Why don't you just through caution to the wind and try and seduce her a bit. I'm thinking maybe you've been reading up on how to please a woman...if not you should. Then maybe if you do have a sexually pleasing experience (from her point of view) her confusion will be less pronounced?
