Another one joins the flock (III)

[Mike85]

Well, it's been a week since the dreaded anniversary weekend...

I had a blast at both the high school football game and during my college homecoming weekend. I had the double pleasure of running into former students (that were either in college or had recently graduated from college) and MANY of my alumni Fraternity Brothers. Having great people from different spheres of my life interacting wasn't some traumatic "worlds collide" (a la Seinfeld) issue, but instead fed my ego big time. It was nice to have my Brothers telling my former students what I mean to the Fraternity while my former students were telling my Brothers what I great teacher I was for them. Great parties, met great people, and got an ego boost from a coed or two...

Things with W are the same as usual. She and OM are playing house, and are both having money issues - her job (nail salon) is a luxury that people are cutting back on, and his job (financial planning) has taken a HUGE hit of late. Me? I'm doing just fine.

W and OM are apparently planning a trip to Jamaica in December despite their current money issues. W is hellbent on having those "things" that are part of the lifestyle she said I couldn't give her (and has cited as her reason for leaving me and shacking up with a dysfunctional OM...he claims to have $$$). At this point, I recognize that W has deep-seated issues and that I would demand counseling for her/us before any reconciliation could occur.

Thanks to counseling and time, I've come to realize that what W has done is NOT due to anything I did or did not do and that people telling me that I "MUST HAVE contributed to the situation somehow" are full of manure. Nothing I did or did not do justified W's decision to abandon her family and commit adultery in the quest for a lifestyle to which she believes she is entitled.

I'm working at being amicable with W, doing what I can for the welfare of my kids, and moving on with my life. I'm not moving forward with anything legally (nor is W) and have no intention of making any S or D maneuvering any easier for W (thank you NY for making the process difficult and lengthy...). I believe that W will recognize her mistake in time and I really want her to get the help she needs and will be there for her to eventually restore our family. I pray for her and us every night. In the meantime, I'm LOVING my new teaching gig, have fully embraced my role as alumni president for my Chapter, and have a blast every time I have my kids with me.