I wonder if what you see here is actually yourself. I know that you have posted in the past that you can relate to FIB's wife, that you can understand how she feels. Could it be that you are so busy seeing yourself in her, and trying to make FIB see that (as you would like your H to), that you can't see what is really there? I think you are off the mark here.
Not to come down on glamgirl but I want to mention that once upon a time here on the boards I went through a stage in which, because of my own guilt, I couldn't separate myself - my pain and regret - from what I perceived to be the potential pain and regret of the MLC wife of a poster that needed to let her go.
What Nic suggests is a very real possibility, glamgirl. Guilt, regret and that damned 20/20 vision you get when you're looking back can make you almost NEED to play a role in "making" a man stand.
Perhaps God IS laying this on your heart. It does happen and I'm not one to say if it's happening to you or not but I do know this:
You have to search every corner of your own heart and pray repeatedly about a sitch such as this before you post and possibly lay undeserved (and perhaps even unmanageable) grief and guilt on another person who has already been through so much.
Glamgirl, it took a personal telephone conversation with the poster I previously mentioned before I grasped the depth of the pain he'd already endured and that it was TIME for him to stand down and save himself before he became another casuality of his wife's crisis.
Sometimes a MLCer HAS to be LET GO OF COMPLETELY to even have a chance to realize what things really matter.
