I am not going to say a word about his actions while he is gone. Pushing the boundaries is not going to make him miss me and want to come home and be with me for good. So because it will not take me closer to my goals then I am not going to go there. I will just trust him and tell him that I trust him and then do a LOT of praying while he is away.
I am still stressed a little bit but I feel that deep down we are patching things up and that if I can make it through this next month and a half that things will be in a totally different place for us.
I think the most important thing is to spend as much time as possible with him before he leaves, to stay in contact with him while he is gone (this is something he will have to take the lead on since I will not know his schedual), and continue to work on GAL and making and meeting my own goals while he is gone.
I am thinking about writing him a letter to give to him before he leaves. We have always done this before traveling. When I went away to Guatemala both times he gave me a letter and something personal to keep to remind me of him and when he went to boot camp I got him a card and wrote in it to keep him thinking of me and then I sent him a lot of things while he was gone like a t-shirt with my perfume on it. That kind of thing. I still have time to figure out what to do and I will post any letter draft on here for your guys' stamp of DB approval first. I just think it would be weird to break that tradition and it could help give him something ti think of while he is away.
I am sad that he is leaving. I am praying that it is only going to be the 29 days, maybe even less. And I just have to hope and pray that he will get transferred out of his unit before they go to war.
I know I cannot stress too much because it will just cause tension and that is the last thing that we need between us right now. I just have to trust that it will be okay and keep myself busy. Being in this position is hard enough and then you throw in the military aspect and things get really nuts!
I keep thinking about Jen and how life is really unpredictable and way too short and it makes me sad for her and for all of us. I hope that she is doing okay.
