No Mike, sorry. I'll be sure to youtube it once i get it close though. my current project is teaching the little one how to spit after brushing her teeth. its much more enjoyable than learning a new flatulance based tune and without the residual odors.
and to see her face as she spits is worth everything.
"In a ham and eggs breakfast, the hen is involved, but the pig is committed".
your last post really made my day - smiling for no apparent reason - that's excellent - that's coming from inside. It's great to hear more of your voice coming through your posts again.
Hey Carlos, its going ok, not bad, not great. each day gets a little better, doing some shopping - clothes for daugher, LCD TV, camera, furniture - so that gives me some instant gratification.
STBXW aggrevated me this morning. i know, detach.
a few weeks ago we discussed a schedule for our daughter, STBXW gets her monday and wednesday nights, i get her tuesday thursday, we switch every other friday for the weekend. thats as close to a 50/50 split which fits our schedules that i could come up with. plus it gives each of us a long weekend - she gets her thursday night to monday morning some weekends, others i get her friday night to tuesday morning.
this morning she says she's not comfortable with that schedule, she feels our daughter would be passed around too much. STBXW didnt have any schedule worked out that we could discuss - typical, doesnt like my decision but doesnt have a suggestion of her own. she's been planning on leaving for at least 5 months, and just weeks before she leaves, she still doesnt have a schedule. i guess OM hasnt told her what it should be yet.
she probably heard from her lawyer that with that schedule and our pay being equal she wont get any child support.
just ticks me off that she's claiming to worry about our daughter, but hasnt done anything to fix our R, was taking our daughter on play dates with the OM, wanted to rent a house with OM, all of which, in my opinion, is not good for my daughter.
besides that i've had great days, some mediocre days. getting my head back into work. lawyer is confident I can protect my assets, and with the housing and stock market the way it is, it works in my favor. friends are all great support, i had to pass up a night out with my Dr friend and a bunch of nurses - i'll have time for that later. going to see my brother this weekend, so that'll be great.
at this point i just want to get this over with, want her out of the house and out of sight. feel nothing for her anymore, not much anger, just going to let karma do its job. daughter will be fine when she's with me, cant control what STBXW does.
taking a break from therapy, just want to work through this by myself right now. may or may not go back. told C this and she made me feel like i was breaking up with a girlfriend. i felt like i had to give her counseling. schedule is just tight, money is tight, work is demanding - bunch of little reasons.
"In a ham and eggs breakfast, the hen is involved, but the pig is committed".
if you can do 50/50 do not waffle. Stay the course. Do not let her use your daughter's feelings to justify you getting less visitation..Stand firm brother. Set the tone now. Get what you can get now..once it's done it's hard to get it changed.
Hang in there Ken. Your W (as you say) has probably realised the consequences of not having D more than you more than anything it does for D. Be strong and if your L thinks it will be ok, stick at it.
My W is similar, anything I suggest as a flexible solution or a compromise is a definite no, but often she will return a week later or something and offer me exactly what I offered her and think it's a great idea. For example, she was talking about not doing mediation as we might not agree much, but I was like, well, whatever we agree we save time on sols to sort. She didn't hear that, then a week later she comes to me saying, yeah, lets do mediation and L (her friend) says whatever we agree we don't need to do through the sols...I just smiled and said, cool, ring and organise then....LMAO at some of this batchitt crazy stuff.
Oh, I also mentioned we need to agree household stuff as part of a settlement, like me needing all furniture etc and she was like...what....You really are in cloud cukoo land...ok then...bye. lol
The silly thing is, I believe these actions are in return of the way we are now and moving on and them still unable to accept their part in it. They just keep going rather than sit back and stop being so stubborn. got to still justify that we made them have A and see OM etc.
GL buddy. Just laugh it off and know we all go through similar
50/50 and not a second less is my goal. I'm a real laid back sort of guy, i can usually take whatever is thrown at me. hit me, kick me, no big deal - i've been through worse than anything anyone can give me now. I've spent years in hell, this is a cake walk.
BUT, if she tries to pull something using my daughter, she'll get to see the part of me i've always kept locked up. if she wants ugly i can get mighty ugly. if she wants nice-nice, then thats what she'll get.
but i will not waiver with my daughter.
she's queen of the sympathy stories, all her friends are so sad for her, so sorry she's had to live in such misery for oh so long. of course, she never mentions the OM to them, Oh No, that would negate the poor poor me stories right off.
and Arthur, you're so right about her keeping on her course, regardless of reality. i think that there was a part of her that wanted to work on the R, but because she'd told so many people her 'pity me' stories she couldnt back track. she'd never accept her role in this, not now.
and i'm fine with that. you reap what you sow.
"In a ham and eggs breakfast, the hen is involved, but the pig is committed".
