I'm sad for your scars. I have them too. It's a little frightening to me how quickly the love and caring can turn into contempt and fear - at least, I feel like I need to protect myself from the uneven emotional advances of my XW in order to maintain an even keel.
He may want to explain his side of things and you may not be ready to hear it. He may express regret and again, you may not be ready to hear it. I don't know. I think you should always give the benefit of the doubt, but maybe things are too raw to do this in real time? Maybe it's better that he write you a letter if there is something he really wants to say?
If my XW would want to talk, I think that's what I'd say to her. Take it for what it's worth.
