Native, Not sure what kind of advice I have. Just wanted to let you know that there are others out there in a similar position. My W left back in April saying that we would continue working on the R. There was however, no dates or attempts to work on us after that. She also has been pushing for me to get her equity out of the house. Fortunately in our situation, we do have equity, but considering the market, it is not the best time to sell. Not to mention the further instability, moving, etc. All the things you mentioned.
As far as PG is concerned... I don't think there is anything you can do about this. If you give W an ultimatum, she will likely ignore it and resent you for it at the same time. Legally there is probably nothing you can do either. Unless there is an issue with D's safety, the law won't step in to right you W's bad decisions.
My advice: Do nothing at this point. Talk to a lawyer, but there is no need for you to file. Maybe a formal separation agreement to protect yourself.
