Kissa,
My H still lives at home, but he treats me about like yours does. Why he is still at home, I have no idea--money, maybe? I don't think so, because even though we are in debt up to our eyeballs, it doesn't stop him from spending a good (or bad) $500.00 a month on OW-related stuff; OW wants desperately for him to move out so she can move in with him. Doesn't tell me anything unless he has to (for example, when he is going out of town to be with OW, who lives five hours away, he calls and leaves me a message while he's en route so I won't worry when he doesn't come home for a couple of days--doesn't even have the guts to tell me in person, even though I never react more than just "OK"). He invariably responds to my friendly, non-pressuring questions like "anything interesting happen today?" with "No" or "Fine" as applicable, doesn't ask me anything about my life, usually. Never touches me or treats me with any warmth whatsoever, although he is nominally polite.

Sorry, I'm venting on your thread. I don't have any answers about this, but at least you're not alone, for what it's worth...

Peace,
Dawn

Me 45/H 47, no kids
Together since 1985; M/1992
Bomb1 (EA-OW1, age 22) 2001
Bomb2 (EA/PA-OW2, age 22) 10/2007, A continues
H left 11/24/08
minimal contact, no legal action
http://tinyurl.com/DawnHope1