We can't focus on what we didn't do or what we could do better... I have done the same song and dance in my head... for all of us .. our H wouldn't be moving out and they would be working on the marriage if there wasn't another women in the picture.
I have to ask you to really search your soul here. In my sitch I know it hurt to do that BUT if the M hadn't had problems an OW wouldn't have been able to become a third party in our M.
Also, if one doesn't think about what we did or didn't do to a certain extent how can we change and try to sort things out? I am not saying YOU have to do all the changing...but something has to start the ball rolling.
I do understand how easy it is to swing from bending over backwards and trying to sort the M out...to feeling really fed up and upset and cross about it all - that's only natural. But to grow one DOES need to explore one's own behaviour.
I am sorry you are having such a bad day.
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
