M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
It sounds like the hardest thing for you is that you have chosen to remain friends with him throughout this mess. I think sometimes because of this he doesn't see that he could really lose you. You may have to make some changes with this or put your foot down, tell him to cut out the nonsense and come home.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
No...seriously...we should get you some of those darts from the south pacific.....
I like how Michelle thinks.
So do we shoot to kill or merely maim?
Kat you are right. I do make it harder on me because I choose to remain friends. I just have to keep GAL and doing what I do for me and whatever happens, happens. I'm going to be fine. Not just ok, but fine. It will all work out, it may not be the "happy ending" that I'd hoped for, but things won't stay this way forever. It makes it easier when he doesn't say things like he did on Saturday or about that song, that just complicates things. Yesterday was just a bad day and today is not. So I just need to get past it and move on.
That baby will be here within the next month, so no matter what the situation will not stay the same. Such is life.
Last edited by Sugar and Spice; 09/30/0805:35 PM.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
Glad to hear that DS is hanging in there with his injury and all. How about your little angel - how is she?
I think you know that I agree 110% with Kat.
Originally Posted By: Sugar and Spice
Yesterday was just a bad day and today is not. So I just need to get past it and move on.
So how is today different from yesterday? What's changed? What are you doing differently? Are you really doing something different or is the issue just getting swept under the rug because that's what your H would like? He would like for you to think that everything will be fine once this kid is born and you want to believe him?
I'm really sorry, Corey, if I'm being a downer, but many times you have said that our H's behaviors resemble each other very closely, so I do have to wonder. I also wonder if you are a bit like me in the way that I settle for the crumbs and all the other wishful, sappy BS he serves up? Like the song, for instance.
Why must everything hinge on the birth and paternity of this child? Why are you settling for that? Why are you continuing to give him the emotional support he wants when he is willing to give nothing to you in return? Sticking YOU - YOUR M TO HIM - on the back burner because it's how he sees fit.
It angers me, Corey. That this man can so easily put some other skank woman - whether she's pregnant with his child or not - over his own W and the mother of his children. That is a FACT, whereas the facts about the unborn child are not known. And it hurts me even more to know that you are hurting yourself by allowing these current circumstances to continue. I know it because I've done it myself.
I am sorry if I've stepped over the line - this is your sitch and no one can tell you how to handle it. I guess I'm just wanting to see something change here, and for the better. And not in a way that is good for H and H only.
(((((((Corey)))))))
Last edited by GoingForward; 09/30/0806:07 PM.
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward. ~ Joseph Campbell
Glad to hear that DS is hanging in there with his injury and all. How about your little angel - how is she?
I think you know that I agree 110% with Kat.
Originally Posted By: Sugar and Spice
Yesterday was just a bad day and today is not. So I just need to get past it and move on.
So how is today different from yesterday? What's changed? What are you doing differently? Are you really doing something different or is the issue just getting swept under the rug because that's what your H would like? He would like for you to think that everything will be fine once this kid is born and you want to believe him?
I'm really sorry, Corey, if I'm being a downer, but many times you have said that our H's behaviors resemble each other very closely, so I do have to wonder. I also wonder if you are a bit like me in the way that I settle for the crumbs and all the other wishful, sappy BS he serves up? Like the song, for instance.
Why must everything hinge on the birth and paternity of this child? Why are you settling for that? Why are you continuing to give him the emotional support he wants when he is willing to give nothing to you in return? Sticking YOU - YOUR M TO HIM - on the back burner because it's how he sees fit.
It angers me, Corey. That this man can so easily put some other skank woman - whether she's pregnant with his child or not - over his own W and the mother of his children. That is a FACT, whereas the facts about the unborn child are not known. And it hurts me even more to know that you are hurting yourself by allowing these current circumstances to continue. I know it because I've done it myself.
I am sorry if I've stepped over the line - this is your sitch and no one can tell you how to handle it. I guess I'm just wanting to see something change here, and for the better. And not in a way that is good for H and H only.
(((((((Corey)))))))
This is what I was saying last night, too.
It's hard to see your H messing with your head and puting priority somewhere else. I think kat was even saying that its time to tell him to chit or get off the pot.
Like we agreed, you and I are the same. I want SO badly to be her friend, but I think the way I'm handling it right now is the best way to win her back somehow. I want her to miss the friendship that she wants to keep. I give a little, then I'll pull back.
I've told myself, if D happens, maybe we'll be friends then, I suppose. I could be wrong.
H4H bear hug to ya'.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
